As I sat knee’s locked and neck cramped squished into my seat on possibly the cheapest airline in the United States I had a lot running through my mind. I was returning home from our annual company trip to Scottsdale Arizona where I had just spent the last 5 days trying to find a balance between accomplishment and indulgence (not an easy balance to strike especially when the drinks are free and the peer pressure is high). I was the only person in my row not completely comatose or squinting to watch a pirated movie on a tiny phone so instead I was left to ponder my trip, my month and my life.
My trip in years past, had been something I looked forward to all year. A chance to escape the day to day grind of the retail environment and let loose for five days with a dozen or so other managers looking to do the same. The challenge was always to see how hard we could party, for how many nights in a row and still be semi functional for the next days meetings (I walked this line very closely in years past). That of course was not the company’s intent (they always scheduled a string of trainings and team building exercises) but rather just a by-product of the tropical weather and Arizona lifestyle. This year though things seemed different, I was different. Unlike previous trips I found myself less interested in the customary binge fests that the group was embarking on and instead I found I was much more interested in just sitting back and enjoying the ride. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to let loose (and I did to a certain degree a few nights) but it was far more valuable for me to wake up early and just enjoy a cup of coffee and a meditation by the pool or to sit on my patio and do some writing. I wondered. ‘had my priorities changed so dramatically in such a short time?’
As I shifted in my seat attempting desperately to find a comfy position I thought back to the beginning of the month and why I had taken on my ‘mindfulness challenge.’ I recalled feeling maxed out, stressed out, and generally frustrated with my lack of productivity. I remembered identifying a “resume of personal flaws” which I knew were the root cause of my major problems. Organization, planning, balance, distractions, stress, and not being present were all holding me back from the life I wanted. Now a month later I felt a great sense of optimism; to my disbelief with a few productivity hacks, the GTD method and a mindful focus I was actually conquering some these major shortcomings, and more over I realized I was far happier than I had been in a really long time.
Train The Brain Effect
Through regular mindfulness practices like meditation and yoga I was slowly discovering a control over my life that I never knew I had. I found I was more consciously aware of my emotions and my weaknesses and I could actively work on correcting them. Just identifying to myself what my issues were allowed me to far more easily see when they were arising and how I needed to correct them.
I actually discovered an amazing example of this completely by chance while in Arizona. One of the other managers wanted to take an afternoon to go golfing. Not getting the chance to go golfing often and especially in Arizona I jumped at the opportunity. Unfortunately of our group he and I were the only ones crazy enough to venture out into the 30+C. weather for hours of physical activity. Now to create some context here I golf maybe 3-4 times per year and usually shoot in the low 110s (I literally can’t remember the last time I got a Par let alone a Birdie). Derek on the other hand is a much more avid golfer and at this point had already gotten approximately 39 rounds under his belt so far this year. Needless to say I was venturing out for the entertainment value more than anything else.
The Phoenician Golf and Country Club
As I toured the course with Derek I discovered something very surprising, I was actually playing really well! Not PGA well mind you, but for me I was crushing! My drives were straighter, my chips were more accurate, my putting was crazy and all of it was showing on my score card. After the front 9 I already had 2 Pars and a Birdie! So what was I doing different? What miraculous magic was causing my golf game to hit new heights? Well, mindfulness. All I was doing was approaching each shot as mindfully as I could. I was thinking about simple things like slowing down my back swing or not striving for the green with every shot and it I was drastically improving my game. I realized golf was an interesting test for mindfulness since it’s the only game you play solely against yourself. If you drop 3 balls into the water trying to get to the green in 2 strokes instead of playing it safe like you know you should, that’s on nobody but you.
The thing I found really interesting about this though wasn’t just that I was shooting better golf but that if mindfulness was having this much of an affect on my golf game I could only imagine what kind of results I could get by applying to other areas of my life.
Don’t Be A Narrow Minded Prejudging A-hole
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this last month its been learning not to prejudge things until I really give them a chance. To look back I am almost ashamed at the narrow view I started with on both meditation and Yoga. I saw them as a hokey, spiritual practices that were only for long-haired hippies and weirdo’s. I past them off as something not worth my time and continued to try to balance my life the same un-functional way I always had. Now a month later I’m wondering how I could possibly live my life without them. Meditation had added so much value and capacity to my life just by forcing me to practice the simple concept of mindfulness and although I hadn’t had the opportunity to practice Yoga much I really enjoyed that followed through on that same mindful practice on the physical side of the body.
I guess that’s the thing I also loved most about my journey to ‘scale my life’; these challenges were forcing me to step outside of my comfort zone and truly experience things I never would have bothered to really give a fair chance. I was adding so much value, passion, and fulfilment to my life and I wasn’t even half way through my year.
Curating A Fuller Life
This thought brought me back to the feeling of greater happiness I had previously noted as a result of my month. I think that this was more than just something I was experiencing as a result of conquring some of my shortcomings; I think I was feeling happier because at the same time I was removing some of the negative aspects of my life I was also adding so much value to my life. I was biking, budgeting, cooking, planing, perusing, exploring, growing and learning. I felt like this is what a full life should be, busy yet balanced, full but still fun.
As I de-boarded the plane, stretched my legs and tried my best to pop my ears (I hate that feeling) I looked back the plane and again thought about the journey I had just taken. I think I now knew why I was no longer interested in the same indulgent activities I had been so addicted to in the past. I had found new things to fill my life and as much as I still enjoyed the escape every now and then I was far more content with this new life that I was slowly building for myself.
